A spokesperson for Victoria Police described Melbourne Victory fans as ‘thoughtless and wasteful’ after no flares were lit in tonight’s A-League fixture, despite heightened police presence.

“We doubled the amount of police tonight because of last week’s incident with flares, yet absolutely nothing happened.”

“These police officers don’t work for free, we even had to pay them overtime, and yet the careless A-League fans gave them nothing to do.”

The spokesperson expressed Victoria Police’s strong disappointment in the lack of flares or crowd violence, calling it a “blatant waste of taxpayers’ money”.

Victoria Police made clear in a statement posted on social media that taxpayer’s money was not entirely squandered, with numerous people kicked out for “celebrating too loudly”.

An Australian sporting expert replied to Victoria Police’s post on social media with his analysis of the situation, describing “we should just ban soccer in Australia”.